Weiss Kreuz in MP&tHG  Assault of the Demonic Rab
by SketchyMatteh
Summary: This is the scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail where they come across the cave to the monster of Aauuuuggghh.  Except with members of the Weiss and Schwarz teams instead of the Knights of the Round of course.


**Weiss Kreuz in: Monty Python and the Holy Grail**

**Assault of the Demonic Rabbit**

"Hunters of the Night, deny this beast his tomorrow!" Persia declared through the video screen, his silouette towering over the four men as he gave his orders.

"Yessir." The four men of Weiss stared back at the screen through the darkness. Aya in his usual place against the support pillar, Ken and Youji claiming the couch, and Omi sitting in the adjacent chair. All of them had looks of doubt on their faces.

But why?

(Later on)

It was dreary outside, and there was not a living residence in site, literally the middle of nowhere.

Aya, Ken, Youji, and Omi, the four members of Weiss crouched down against some rocks, all of them with extremely pissed off looks on their faces.

"Why did he have to bring us all the way out here for a friggin mission? It's the middle of nowhere, and our target is nowhere in sight!" Ken shouted angrily and kicked some nearby rocks, sending pebbils and dust flying into the air.

"Seriously" commented Youji. "I could have been picking up hot chicks or something. Anything's better than this."

"Shut it you two!" yelled Aya in a stern voice. "At this rate we'll never finish this mission. It's direct orders so quiet down and cooperate for once."

"Oh……..do we have to Aya? Besides……this monster sounds scary anyway. What exactly is this monster…uhm……..uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugggghhhhh….anyway?" Omi questioned, looking up at Aya with an adorable please-be-nice-tome look on his face.

"I don't know." Replied Aya coldly.

The team watched the entrance to the cave with little real interest, and after about 15 minutes a small white rabbit appeared from out of the entrance, and started munching on some grass patches.

"This…….can't be it." Aya said, irritation making itself ever present in his voice.

"This…..is absolute BullCrap!" Ken began to rant again, extending his claws and pointing them in the general direction of said fuzzy opponent.

"Oh My God It's So Cute!!!!" Cried Omi excitedly.

"I wouldn't be so sure of the cute part, lovely." Said a voice from behind another pair of rocks.

"Show yourself." Aya said, pointing the end of his katana towards the source.

A person with long, bright orange hair, wearing a hunter green sports coat and donning black shades, appeared out from behind the rock formation. He was accompanied by three other comrades: a tall man with short jet black hair, glasses, and a business suit, Crawford; a smaller boy who looked no older than 15 or 16 in a blue outfit similar to university garb, with short brown hair that framed his face,-much like omi's, named Nagi; and a rather lanky and pale young man with an eye patch, covered in scars and bandages, with a shock of white hair, wearing black slacks and a blue sleeveless sport coat, Farfarello. All of them looked rather psychotic in nature, yet amused.

"Why hello dearies. Long time no see" replied the carrot-topped adversary.

"Greeting kittens" Smiled Farfarello in a chilly tone.

"Schwarz….you swine….tsk" Youji scowled. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, nothing much. The boys and I here thought we'd get out for a little fresh air." Smiled Schuldig.

"We were just bored. Heard you were in the neigborhood." Replied Nagi.

And it's my responsibility to keep them in line. 'Sides, we're after the same thing as you, save this thing." Said Crawford. "By the way, that's not your targer, it's just a guardian."

"A what?" Said Weiss in unison.

"A guardian. It's just watching the entrance to the cave. Don't underestimate it. It's quite the lethal creature." Said Nagi, looking matter-of-factly towards said rabbit.

"But it's so cute" said Omi. "How can something that cute be so deadly?"

"Doesn't matter, it's in our way." Said Aya, taking a step toward the rabbit.

"Agreed. It's one of God's filthy creations, it needs to be killed!" Said Farfarello, his voice becoming adamant on the subject of killing.

"Right" said Youji and Ken, both getting up to follow Aya and the rest of Schwarz, leaving a dejected and crying Omi behind the rocks.

"But it's so cute! We cant' kill it!" Cried Omi.

"Shut up!" Said Aya.

As the group neared the entrance, the rabbit stopped eating. It's eyes narrowed into tiny slits and began to glow a sinister red. It perked its ears up and glared in the direction of the approaching members of both Weiss and Schwarz.

"What the?" Said several of them at once.

"Like I said…..an abomination." Said Farfarello.

"Let's just kill it already." Said Aya, jumping into the air, katana poised at the ready, aiming to kill.

A flash of white and red was seen, and suddenly……

"Agh!" groaned Aya as he fell, wounded by the fluffy horror.

"Oh my god! " cried Youji, as the rabbit turned on him.

"Somebody help!" Yelled Ken, clearly losing his bearings.

"Help yourself!" Smirked Nagi, making a force field around himself and running inside the cave.

"This is insane!" Said Crawford, turning to follow Nagi.

"I can't outrun it!" Shouted Schuldig as he scrambled away from the demonic fluffball.

"Die you atrocity of the heavens!!!!" Declared Farfarello as he took a last swing at it with his pike.

"not cute…..Not Cute!!!" Cried Omi, still distraught at the reality of a demonic rabbit.

(10 minutes later)

The members of Weiss and Schwarz were all defeated, and lay sprawled across the ground in every direction, some dead, others clearly unconscious, or outright afraid to move for fear of the rabbit, which sat munching on grass again.


End file.
